I didn’t really know what to title this post, and to be honest, I’m not really sure if anyone will be interested in reading the following thoughts. But for the sake of my own heart and for the sake of even one that this may encourage I feel led to share what life is like right now. I think I am still in shock that Christmas is really over and that our airline tickets are really purchased. Like the flip of a switch, moving our family of five to the Czech has become very, very real almost overnight. We have moved from theory to reality. In case you ever wondered what must be going through the mind of a “missionary” (even though we are no different from believers living out their faith anywhere else), let me share. I am overwhelmingly grateful for the past year that we have had to live with, vacation with, rejoice with, cry with, plan weddings with, and share meals with family and friends and for all of the precious memories we and our children have made. I have been undeservingly blessed to do life with precious believers at a healthy, Gospel-centered church here in South Carolina who have challenged my faith and helped me to become more like Christ. As we continue in the packing process I continually come across sweet little reminders of the past 14 months: a baseball hat Micah wore to the many high school football games he attended with my dad; a maternity top I was wearing this time last year as I waited anxiously on bed rest for our sweet baby boy to arrive; and a memoir from a trip shared with family over the summer. These items bring tremendous joy as I realize how gracious our God has been to give us this time living near family. Up until October of last year, we had spent the majority of our marriage and the entirety of Micah and Lily’s lives four hours away from family, and we’re so grateful to have lived close to them during this time.
But these treasures also bring a sting of pain as I realize that this season of life is coming to an end, and no matter how steadfast I feel in our calling to the Czech, I realize now more than ever that this is an act of obedience and a sacrifice. Is it a sacrifice worth making? Without a doubt! Is it a more noble sacrifice because of the distance and the magnitude? Not in the least. This is just the sacrifice that God has asked our family to make. This is the calling He has placed on our lives, and as we continue to prepare for this big move, I have a million and one thoughts swimming through my head. I am happy. I am sad. I am excited. I am nervous. I am completely overwhelmed. I am humbled. I am grateful. I am a little stressed. I am BUSY. But in the midst of these emotions I am trying to stay FOCUSED. Focused on the tremendous sacrifice my Lord made for me on the cross and focused on the thousands of lost Czechs in our city who have only one other family that we know of advocating for them and seeking to share with them the greatest news on earth! I also think about the moms, the wives, and the other dear women who will one day be my friends and with whom I pray I will have the privilege of sharing Jesus and doing life. These thoughts and my time in God’s Word are the anchors for my soul. My world seems at times like it is spinning out of control with so many things to do and not enough time to accomplish them. However, tonight I am choosing to let it all go and just rest in God’s provision, His timing, and His sufficient grace.
Will you please pray for me, my sweet husband, and our precious children? Will you ask that we will continue to rest in our Heavenly Father as we travel, pack, visit, and prepare? And will you please let us know how we can pray for you so that we can take our eyes off of ourselves and focus on others, especially during this season?